No one said it would be easy…
If they did say it – they are lying to you. But it’s ok Mama. There’s nothing wrong with being frustrated about motherhood.
It takes a lot to be a Mom…
Sleepless nights. Shower-less days. Schedules full of activities. parenting isn’t for the faint of heart. And while some say it gets easier with time, tust me. Whatever battles you think you’ve won, will be replaced with new ones, the older your child gets.
The first step to dealing with the frustration of motherhood; is realizing it’s entirely ok to be frustrated about motherhood.
Every Mom is frustrated sometimes…
While some may never show it, trust me, they do. The desire (and even need) to perpetrate this misconception of the perfect life as a Mom, might help some cope. But ultimately, gives the majority of parents the feeling of failure.
We see those perfect Instagram feeds of an all white kitchen, that’s probably never seen a spaghetti pot, and think “Why don’t I have that?”
Immaculately posed family photos, each member wearing a matching denim outfit to coordinate with their script button down shirts and perfect teeth. Most moms think “How did they get the toddler to keep the shirt on?”
What most parents don’t realize, is the truth behind these misconceptions. That kitchen has been completely covered in pea-green baby food. And those kids in ironed button downs? They were probably all screaming and running two seconds after the picture was taken, if not before.
Those Moms are also frustrated about motherhood – they just won’t tell anyone.
How do I deal with the frustration?
Firstly, I don’t buy into the fake social media feeds and photos. It’s important to realize that they people we see online, (or Television, or Movies) are only showing us their internet selves – not their true selves. And it’s a untrue caricature of reality.
Never compare yourself to the caricatures!
There’s something you have to you understand about that Mom who bakes in pearls, married her prom king, and doesn’t look like she ever raises her voice. She actually only wore those pearls for a photo. No one cares about highschool when you’re over 30. And she just got done yelling at her kids for jumping on the couch.
Every Mom becomes frustrated about motherhood, at one time or another.
And It’s Totally Ok!
Parenting is not easy! There’s gonna be days you struggle with choices. Periods of doubt. And even flat out frustration over the simplest tasks, that are made 10 times harder by a toddler temper tantrum.
No one ever says you have to be this picture perfect Mom. No one says you can’t find yourself wondering if you’re doing the right thing.
Learn to breathe
When you do find yourself with those feelings of frustration coming on, take a moment.
If it’s putting in ear buds and jamming out while you scrub peanut butter out of the carpet. Or walking to the backyard to sit by the roses before heading back inside to ask ‘why the dog is missing fur from his back?’ (when you know there’s a pair of safety scissors with the culprits name on them sitting on the table).
Take however many moments you need to center yourself before tackling the next chaotic moment. Connect with a mom friend for support (not the one in pearls with stainless houses).
And just let yourself be flat-out frustrated! There’s nothing wrong with it, and in the end, everything will be ok. Even if you never get the slime stains out of the living room rug.
So good to know that I’m not alone when getting frustrated with motherhood and that’s it’s ok feel that way. Motherhood is hard and it doesn’t help when social media often paints a different picture. Will definitely take more moments to breathe and center myself moving forward. Thank you for your post