Bruce & TJ

Since birth, I’ve noticed that not only is my son incredibly cute, and attracts attention for it, but he is naturally friendly and sociable.

For a first time mom, this was terrifying at first. It took me a while to not only get used to strangers looking at my baby, but really, REALLY wanting to interact with him. I admit that before I had my own, I would talk to babies in the stores and the mall, but I myself would never dream of trying to hold them.

We are asked this on a daily basis.

I don’t allow strangers to hold my child, and I get wary if I think they are following us (it has happened.). It doesn’t help that Bruce is looking over my shoulder laughing at people and engaging them more.

The most recent creepy encounter happened at Publix. My husband and I were almost done shopping, and were glancing over a display of muffins. Out of no where, a small, elderly lady in a motoized cart spoke up and asked if we “had muffins for the baby?”

I just laughed and said “he has his own snacks” because I didn’t really relish the thought of my ten month old jacked up on so much sugar from a chocolate muffin, half the size of his head.
She then asked me more intently if I got the baby any muffins. 

‘Ok, maybe you’re just weird’ I thought as I ushered my little pack away from this lone wolf, and tried to check out. She then gets right behind us, and as I’m paying I see my husband giving me the most puzzled look as I watch this stranger lean over her scooter to tell my son he needed to start asking for a pony: and that “Grandma Gertrude” said it was ok.

I didn’t flip out and start screaming or hit the doors and run like a crazy person: but I’d be a liar if a tiny part of me didn’t outweigh this option. Some people just really love kids, and I’ve noticed a lot just really love my kid. And that’s ok. I’m never going to let him come in harm’s way, and the last thing I want to do is be rude to someone who might be having a hard time, and talking to a cute baby is a nice escape for them. If anything ever does seem very off and threatening, that is a different story. But this blog post isn’t about that: it’s about a lovely woman I shall refer to as TJ.

Since Bruce was about a month old, we were lucky enough to always have our groceries bagged by a very sweet lady named “TJ”, who absolutely LOVED Bruce. She would tickle his feet, and play peekabo behind plastic bags, just to get one of his giggles. She would comment how she didn’t have children of her own but LOVED them, and how she just loved interacting with babies (especially ours). Shopping day is a family event, and soon even my husband enjoyed meeting up with our Publix friend so we could watch Bruce interact with her.

They recently moved her to produce so I myself was disappointed my favorite bagger wasn’t available, more so for the reason Bruce wouldn’t get to play with his buddy. Then we noticed that the department change wasn’t going to hinder anything-Bruce saw her before I did, and they were soon playing peekabo with the dividing counters in the produce section.

I honestly think he looks for TJ each time we go – I know I certainly do. I already love our neighborhood Publix for being the best grocery store in our town, but their friendship makes it better-it’s inspiring to have watched it blossom from tickles on the feet to an all out game of trying to find each other among the bananas.

It makes me remember that most people in the world, are good people. Don’t let that 1% of bad people, ruin it for the 99% of good.

TJ is the only “stranger” I have ever let hold and smother my son with kisses. And she’s very good at it.

The world can be dangerous, but If I raised my son to fear everyone, I feel he would miss out on so much – friends he would never have, opportunities missed, and dreams unrealized. I’m going to be as protective as I can for as long as I can, but I don’t want him afraid to interact with others. I can thanks TJ for helping remind me a stranger is *sometimes* just a friend you haven’t met yet.

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TJ & Bruce

 

Sorry, But I Prefer Old Sesame Street to New Sesame Street

I think pretty much everyone, kids or not, can remember a time when they watched PBS as a child themselves. Be it at home, or at school, at some point, you watched some kind of children’s television.

Now as a mom, we limit tv time, but I have been using it as a good distraction and wind-down method for my son to prepare for naptime. So, since kids absorb everything, it may as well be educational?

The downfall to this is that I am trapped in Sesame Street hell while my son is either,
A: dozing off (dare not disturb anything to disrupt this!)
B: has fallen asleep on top of me and I’m stuck on the couch with no remote within arms reach

As this happens occasionally, I started to notice something. I hate sesame street.

Well, at least the post-Elmo episodes. And no, the alleged Veggie Monster (who turns out to be rumor, not real) has nothing to do with it.

The old episodes from the 70’s & 80’s that I grew up with had a different look and feel, that I don’t get with today’s episodes. They are too updated with CGI and computers. Or maybe I’m just old.

I’m not saying they’re terrible. But it’s one simple, little thing that I can (while forced) use to bond with my child. he’s watching the same thing I watched and enjoyed. It’s the familiarity I like, that makes it easier to connect. Even though kids don’t care-they can’t tell the difference between an episode 20 years old or 2 days old.

Don’t Downplay Your Spouse

Ever talk about your partner?

Everyone is a little guilty of this. I know I am. But I really shouldn’t do it. Chatting with girlfriends, your mom, your best friend from high school, just any normal conversation, the topics sometimes lead to your loved one. Continue reading “Don’t Downplay Your Spouse”

First Mother’s Day

This is my first acutal mother’s day since our son was born.

It’s hard to believe, even almost a year later, that we even created such a perfect little human being. Feels like we just brought him home…hell, it feels like I just found out I was pregnant!

But we did it-we made a perfectly healthy, happy, cute as hell Baby Boy.

Motherhood may have changed me in some ways, but I still feel like the same person I always have been. This is just an extension of me-an add on. An upgrade.

I really didn’t even realize that Mother’s Day applied to me until my husband mentioned it. So, I get a real holiday dedicated to my role as a parent?(In a manner of speaking)

I don’t really want anything. Yes, I say this after my doting husband showered me with an early present of a new laptop (Because you can’t blog on your phone!), and my own Mother bought me a very nice book about the role…I’m happy just to see my son’s smiling face every day. I’m happy to raise a child to call my own. I’m happy enough to be one of the lucky ones; who’s child made it through conception and pregnancy and birth – and will be a year old in less than two months.

Being selfless comes with being a mom too. It’s the natural instinct to put yourself second, fourth, or even not at all-taking care of everything and everyone first. I’ll be too caught up in other things to enjoy the day-but that doesn’t mean all the other mom’s can’t enjoy theirs.

Ryan has been telling Bruce for a while, especially when he’s fussy, that he needs to be “Nice to Mommy.” I’m thinking, ‘Honey, he’s an infant, it’s not like he’s going to roll over and think, ‘Oh my bad! I won’t pull your hair anymore!” And that on Mother’s Day, she needs a break.

I don’t want a break-sleep would be nice, but probably not going to happen. I’m ok with that. I still feel like my baby is too new, and I still need to be selfless 24/7, 365. I’ll have plenty of time when baby is older to get those extra lie-in’s, breakfasts in bed, shopping excursions and pedicures.

So for the other Mom’s out there that are enjoying their holiday with pampering, or even just extra sleep-I hope you do enjoy it. You really deserve it! All Mom’s do, because being a parent is hard. Very, very hard. But so rewarding.

And enjoy it for those of us new mom’s, so caught up in still realize just what they’ve created, to admit they are tired, drained, and just need a break every once in a while. I might be tired and drained as well-but I wouldn’t trade the hardship for anything if it means not seeing that smile every day.

 

 

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