I don’t know who, if anyone has noticed, but I have been very quiet on the blog lately.
As it sometimes does, Life has a way of derailing things; goals, plans, and opportunities. Here, it’s really just been taking my attention away from writing and putting it elsewhere. But, when you take a break from certain things, that’s when your creative juices have time to start flowing, and ideas form.
Ideas, I’ve plenty. Time, however, is another issue.
Our little boy keeps us very busy. Play dates, family visits, and adventurous outings, keep us going a lot. So when we do have a quiet day at home, it’s cherished. My husband has new career opportunities he’s pursuing, and with them come the anxiety of moving to a new city. So between keeping the 13th month old busy, spending what time I can with my husband, and running a household in “on stand by to stand by” mode, at the end of the day; I’m exhausted. All I want to do is veg out, watch trash tv on my tablet, and procrastinate about finishing those four other articles I’m supposed to be writing.
It’s important to not allow yourself to be “spread too thin.” Even more so as a parent, and a partner. I hate not being able to commit to things as much as everyone wants, but sometimes, that’s just the way she goes.
First, I’m a parent. That’s a given. Secondly, I’m a wife. And my marriage requires a certain amount of upkeep that demands attention. My friends, hobbies, passions, and Bachelor reruns come last, if at all. If I’m really lucky, I’ll do my nails while I’m watching Bachelor. I’m usually not that lucky,
So it’s pretty safe to say, I sometimes forget to call that friend back for a nice phone conversation. I may cancel plans for lunch, and I may totally space out booking another get together. But I know what happens when I try to take everything on.
I become too absorbed in trying to accomplish it all, and then frustrated when things don’t work out exactly according to plan. In the end, nothing gets done and I feel even worse, as if the day was wasted.
It’s much easier for everyone, but mostly me, if I delegate responsibilities as I can, and even decline offers when I know I probably should. Even if this means not touching my computer for nearly a month to finish a blog post. It’ll always be there. But some things, like my family, are more important.
In the time it’s taken me to write this, Bruce has gotten up three times and decided he was NOT going to be sleeping in his crib, and has succumbed to sleep on the couch next to me. I’m afraid to move him, and since sleep is so important, I will be snuggling him here. I’ll at least get a trash tv buddy.
It’s too easy to let life overwhelm you when you have so much on your plate. You have to just, as hard as it is, relax a little and think about what’s more important: When you find yourself just carrying the baby all the way upstairs to only get half-way down before they realize you’ve abandoned them to their own bed, and you don’t want to continue this routine five more times that night; then don’t. I believe it’s ultimately more important that you and your kid both have rest, and sanity. If you can let them camp out with you in your bed (or couch), and you both get rest, then do that. It’s not worth stressing over.
Because let’s say I continued the song and dance-we will go back and forth all night, until he catches a second wind and then can’t go back to sleep. We will both get up tomorrow cranky. I have a cocktail party on Saturday I have to prepare for, which means cleaning/organizing the house, and a shopping trip to the grocery store planned around naps my son will now, not be taking because he’s cranky. I’ll forget to call my guest list because I’ll be rushed. I’ll snap at my husband for putting grease and oil stained clothes from his car project, on the newly mopped laundry room floor. He won’t help Saturday when I really need Bruce entertained as I cut up cheese, because I yelled at him. Bruce, who was cranky the day before and will most likely have fought good sleep again throughout that night, will become the top contender for the ‘Clingy Baby Award’ and during my hundredth attempt to placate him with a toy;I’ll remember that I never called my guest list, and wonder why I ever bother to agree to hosting cocktail parties.
It seems like I can avoid a lot of that stress by just not worrying about the upcoming tasks at hand, or even how early I must be up in the morning. And just snuggle this spoiled little Goober on the couch, watch tv until I know he’s passed out enough to put in his crib, and try to slowly take each minute of the day as easily as possible. If I get something done, great. If not, then the oil and dirt streaks on the floor will make a great conversation piece during my cocktail party, that my husband will actually attend because he won’t be pouty. That’s if anyone shows up, because I’m not going to worry about calling them. That’s what facebook invites are for.
It’s not good for anyone to have too many irons in the fire. So I’m only going to pick out the hottest to deal with.