This post contains affiliate links. Please see full disclosure page for more info.
Have you just had a baby?
You’re probably still dealing with a lot of changes! A new little person living in your home. Healing from childbirth. Getting used to the “new you” that is inevitable after becoming a Mother. All of this is perfectly natural! And you will be (as close to as, anyway) back to your old self soon. But one question you may be asking yourself… can I still have intimacy, while in the postpartum stage?
The answer is yes. Here’s some things to keep in mind, and tips to help out…
You still need time to heal and adjust
For some couples, it’s the first thing next to having a alcoholic drink for the first time in nine months, that you want to do. But slow down! It’s recommended that you wait at least six weeks (if you had a vaginal birth, 8-10 weeks for a cesarean) and get approval from your Doctor, before becoming intimate again. That’s because you still have a lot of recovery to do. The risk of infection is still present, and it probably won’t be entirely comfortable. If you had an episiotomy, or cesarean section, you also need to wait for those sutures to heal completely. Not to mention, that you will want to be on some kind of reliable birth control! Be safe, and wait for your Doctor to give you the A-OK, before you attempt intimacy again.
Every Mother’s Recovery Time Is Different…
Remember that when you have a baby, you have done something incredibly extraordinary with your body (and mind). Plus, your hormones are going haywire, not to mention the psychical and mental strength it will take to care for a newborn. So if you aren’t quite ready to return to intimacy, then don’t. Having postpartum relations can be an awkward, undesirable experience if you don’t feel up to it. Maybe you’re overtired, burnt-out on baby snuggles to think about anyone else touching you, or just not comfortable with yourself yet. It’s ok! Give yourself, and your partner, the opportunity to adjust to this new chapter called parenting, and the rest will come. If it’s been a while, and you’re genuinely worried about your lack of desire, it never hurts to talk with your doctor.
Be comfortable with yourself & don’t worry about criticism
One of the hardest things a Mother will encounter during the postpartum phase, is becoming acquainted with her post-baby body. You spend nine months growing a tiny human inside you, and then have to readjust to life with that human finally outside of you. So don’t be surprised that even months after you’ve had your baby, you don’t look quite like you did before pregnancy. Spoiler alert – you aren’t supposed to! You just created, and delivered, a tiny human!! That’s not to say you may never get your bod back to it’s original glory. But don’t feel like it’s a rushed, or unattainable goal. And frankly-so what if it is? Doesn’t change the fact you
can be are a beautiful woman.
Many women don’t feel comfortable with their bodies after having a baby, and worry what their partner will think. But this is the thing – your partner will never see the “flaws” you see. Your partner still thinks you are smokin’ hot. So if you’re ready to become intimate again, don’t let your perception of your post-baby body hold you back. Because your partner certainly won’t.
And if by a slim chance they do, then stop and reevaluate your relationship. Because you deserve way better than someone who will criticize your Mommy Pooch (I have one!), stretch marks, or a little extra junk in the trunk.
Postpartum Intimacy Is Nothing To Be Afraid Of
You’ve gotten through the long trial of pregnancy, and you’re readjusting to life with a new baby. If you’re healed, rested and de-stressed, and ready for intimacy again-go for it! Just because you’re a parent, doesn’t mean you aren’t human anymore.