Love Should Be Stronger Than Anger

Whoever said “Marriage is easy” was never actually married.  But nothing worthwhile is ever going to be easy, or without adjustment.
I have an amazing husband. I literally can’t imagine life without him.
But within any relationship,  there is going to come a time when you do question yourself and wonder,  “how do I put up with this person? “
I only think about this when my husband does something either stupid, or pisses me off.
Like the time I found a can of dip behind the toilet… and then under the couch cushion.. and then wedged between two books on a shelf. “I only hide it because I know you don’t like it. ”
The dip itself didn’t make me angry -although it’s a disgusting habit I wish he would stop-it was the fact not only would he hide it from me,  but he was so terrible at hiding things! It became humorous after a while so I told him that if he kept “hiding” stuff, I would make it disappear and then force him to ask me where it was. Then I could ask him in return why he needed to hide it so badly.
And then one afternoon when the baby was very new, My dear husband accidentally left a spit can next to my identical can of sweet tea and didn’t tell anyone. I only found it after expecting cool, refreshing Brisk, only to be greeted by a Wintergreen tobacco nightmare. The new house rule-don’t spit in anything that isn’t clear plastic.
He also has the innate ability to wake our son, not during just any kind of nap; but during one of those, “Yes he doesn’t nap much but he’s been going for 8 hours straight, can we please get ten minutes of peace” kind of naps. Baby is just barely finally down and its either the slam of the front door, or the loud, boisterous laughs at YouTube that ruin it.
“Sorry honey. “
None of these are really anything to get divorced over. Or even spend more than five minutes being upset about. But that’s how forgiveness should be-given so quickly, you don’t even have time to be mad.
And when you really love somebody, it’s easy to forgive them.
So he hides his nasty tobacco dip (like I’m not going to find it). He leaves disgusting spit-filled cans around for me to mistake as my drink. He wakes the baby. I still love him-and that’s more important than being mad for any amount of time and taking it out on him.
Even if we have an all out argument and both leave for separate rooms of the house until we’ve calmed down; it only lasts as long as it takes to realize that whatever we are fighting about, isn’t worth being that angry.
Now, not all things can be forgiven so easily-lying, adultery, theft. These are pretty big deals. But if you don’t already know how to handle and forgive the little things, how will you ever be able to deal with the big ones?
 
I can’t speak on dealing with a lying husband, a cheating husband, or a thief (Doritios and other foodstuffs don’t count). But I can speak on the little things, and no marriage will ever survive if you can’t handle that sometimes, your spouse is going to do idiotic, stupid, weird things that may piss you off.
But then again, remember that you yourself probably do the same kind of annoying stuff to them. And in the end, you both sleep side by side at night. As long as you can do that, happily, at the end of the day-what does it matter? Keep forgiving them and get in the practice of it. So that if anything big and major does happen, you’ll be able to survive it. Your love should be stronger than your anger.


love

Author: Jasmine

SAHM to one little boy, and wife to a former member of the USMC. I blog about parenting, relationships, brands I love, and product reviews!

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